Anatomy Of A Sales Letter (With A Cheeky Grin)

Sales letters come in many shapes and sizes. Direct mail, online ‘squeeze pages’ emails, flyers-they’re all sales letters and they all need certain elements if they are to be effective.
To explain these elements and how they work I’ve decided (with my tongue stuck firmly in my cheek) to use a little imagery. Now for this to work, you really have to open your mind and let the pictures in.
Bear with me-it’ll be fun!
Okay, so you’re looking at the very enchanting Ms Marcom (that’s short for Marketing Communications, get it?). Ms Marcom is the kind of lady who turns heads wherever she goes. She’s not perfect by any means but knows how to make the most of what she has and turn everything to her advantage.
Now, let’s turn her into a sales letter!
The Headline
The first thing about Ms Marcom that strikes people when they meet her is the way her face captures their eyes. It’s a face not unlike Elizabeth Taylor’s-captivating, with eyes that flash fire while her demeanour remains calm and poised. People can’t help it; they feel like they have to learn more about her.
She really gets their attention.
The Problem
As I said before, Ms Marcom isn’t perfect. She wakes up with problem skin and wobbly bits just like the rest of us. In fact, there are some mornings when she dreads looking in the mirror and would rather stay home in bed!
The Solution
But she’s a true professional. So, with the help of Nancy (Ganz) and Estee (Lauder) Ms Marcom looks nothing short of stunning. By the time she walks out the door she feels like a million dollars and is ready to take on the world!
Credibility
Of course, it takes more than a pretty face to inspire confidence and trust. Ms Marcom displays her discernment and expertise in the labels that she wears and the way she conducts herself. (She’s an angel in Prada and could teach young Hollywood a thing or two about how to wear a good frock!) The way she carries herself, the way she speaks, radiates an air of authority so that anyone in her presence ‘knows Ms Marcom knows her stuff’.
Benefits (not Features)
The benefits Ms Marcom bestows on others are many. She mentors young business people, gives to numerous charities and builds houses for the homeless in her spare time. But most of all people feel so good when they’re around her.
(Paying attention? This is important.)
Indeed, it could be said that the main benefits Ms Marcom gives are the unseen-the emotional.
(Heads up-benefits are about the feeling, features are what you see)
Proof
At every event Ms Marcom attends, she is toasted, complimented and thanked by those she has helped. While a little embarrassed, she always accepts the generous accolades gracefully.
The Offer (and bonuses)
If you’re incredibly lucky you may find yourself invited out to lunch by Ms Marcom. You can be assured of exceptional food, fine wine and entertaining conversation. There will, undoubtedly be a bounty of unexpected delights showered upon you during the repast and you will leave very satisfied indeed.
Guarantee
In fact, Ms Marcom guarantees you will be completely satisfied after your meal or she will send over her own personal chef to cook for you for a month.
Urgency
But you must be quick in accepting her invitation. You see, Ms Marcom has already booked the restaurant and if you don’t step into her limousine now, she will have to leave without you.
Call to Action (and warning about doing nothing)
So say, “Yes” and climb aboard Ms Marcom’s silver-grey luxury limo for a sublime few hours dining by the sea. Remember, the restaurant’s already booked and Ms Marcom is going, with or without you. Don’t miss out!
So there you have it. From headline to call to action in the guise of a beautiful lady called Ms Marcom. (Told you it’d be fun ;D)